Dear Diary

Sunday, April 30, 2006

- sians. one week never blog liaos. lotsa things happened in this week. and i basically cried for one week. because of some friendship matters and school matters. everything is getting out of hands. and i feel very bad for somebody.. she was my most respected, and most loved teacher. but she lost all her dignity in just ONE day. one single day. when everyone was unprepared.

everyone was so disappointed. everyone was depressed. who was the one at fault? yes. we know is who. but did she sincerely apologise? NO. thats the problem. because of you, everyone is in trouble now. because of you, we feel sorry and worry for her. because of you, our relations with other classes worsen. because of you, everything has changed. i think everything will not go back to normal. the damage is done. i think no one is gonna forgive you.

we helped you. we give you chances. but what did you give in return? your blooding fcuking attitude. because of your attitude, everyone chose to leave you. they abandon you. now, no one is there to battle with you. you consulted our most beloved. you dragged her down with you. you gave her so many troubles. you made her bow her head down at the others to apologise on your behalf. even after she apologised, you still dint learn your mistake. you told everyone that your apology was not sincere. so what do you want? you want 4eb to beg you forgive them? you want them to apologise to you? i dont think they will. because, i seriously, sincerely think that is your fault.

at first, i support you. i bet most of our classmates do. but as time goes on, the problem becomes worst. your attitude changed everything. my attitude towards you was still ok at that point of time. but after someone helped you apologise and you still have the guts to tell me that you are not in the wrong... i totally feel like slapping you. to wake you up. i hate you now. maybe after rwading this, you will feel that you are being left alone. dont blame me but yourself. just yourself.

some words for you;
knnbccb

Nings

I LOVE YOU 1:53 AM

Sunday, April 23, 2006

my most trusted friend lied. haha. what a joke right? like what jiejie said, "the most trusted one will hurt you the most." its a mistake when i gave her my password. and i think is really stupid now. my guesses were correct... and she lied to me that she was not. how funny right. k.. am gullible. whatever. you wanna make use of me? go a head then.

forget abt all those stuffs now. and continue with my happy day just now. wally smsed me and he said HAHAHA was online. then i online lor. he say weilian sang his song. I love you ni dong bu dong. then weilian dint know after HAHAAH told him. he said he got the song from the internet. how qiao can it be. lame. LOLs. then we chat and chat. he told me jolin's on coming album got is self-composed song. and then he sent me. HAHA! am the first one in the whole world? to hear it. i think is pretty cute.. the tune of the song. its really nice though. haha. it sounds abit comical too. {waiting patiently for jolin's album. } =) fun chatting with him again. but too bad regene wasnt there to laugh with me. =(

haven finish my homework.. and i haven start my revision.. sians.

Nings

I LOVE YOU 2:00 PM

Saturday, April 22, 2006

i have truly given up hope on him. becuase its not worth me doing all those stuffs for him anymore. i have done my best. but you havent. i drifted soooooooooooooo far away from you. all the things you have said before are rubbish to me now. all the things seem to be fake. all the things seems to be all made up. i am really stupid to spent some much effort on you. laugh at me for all you want. i dont care now. all your friends also seem to be going away from you. am so happy to know that. you are so selfish and stupid. and lucky you dint made it. because afterall, you dont fit to be in there. you dont deserve it with you lousy skills.

sorry ____ but am glad to have known you. afterall, we were once united.

Nings

I LOVE YOU 2:23 PM

Friday, April 21, 2006

today was my english oral. it was damn sick can. shan di ruan zha took so long to test one student. everyone and every teacher finished liao, am still sitting there, waiting leh. then i made alot of mistakes lor. i think i wont do very well. but what she ask me was what am familiar with. all the competitions stuff. haha. lucky me. =)

i was sick yesterday after my afternoon nap again. took medicine. lucky i was well this morning. if not.. die die die for oral. LOLs.

nothing much to blog abt. very stress now. so lotsa homework. and i haven exactly start my revision for mid year. am ready to die. =)

Nings

I LOVE YOU 9:38 PM

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

sighs. am so tired nowadays. i just dont know why. i lose my concentration so easily. i see everyone working so hard. but me leh. still struck in the same hole. i hope i can really push myself forward, just a little bit. a lil lil bit will do. because, i think that if i truely work hard now, pushing myself a lil forward, i will be able to concentrade and study. sighs.

and to this stupid idiot; dont act as if you know everything. dont look down on people can. the way you see people is like you are the greastest lor. and stop asking me so many questions whe you dont even trust me. fcuk you!

i really got alot to say.. but i scared i will hurt this person. but, sadly you also cant read my blog mah. LOLs.

nixia is right. i can act like nothing has happened. i can always look on the bright side. but she cant. i can be happy on the outside but bleeding in the inside. xia~ must learn from me k. just forget abt this person lah. tian tian xiang ni k.

kuku, what an dull entry. dont care lah.

Nings

I LOVE YOU 6:20 PM

yesterday's superband's result was a total shock to me lah. the light stopped at xia ri feng. i thought the light spoil lor. f lor. then the host were like congratulating them. wth sia. xia ri feng totally sucked with the cheena poks. after they in, i thought it would be jade who will out sia. but sick lor, G-Force kenna eliminated. may they revived. =)

omg. i flanked my circles test. wth. i got no time to finish all the questions lah. am so disappointed can. pls, toa peh gong let me pass k!! just a pass also will do. =) {i know how much i pray i also fail one. duh. =( }

just now during fnn, the whole class was blogging/ tagging. then mrs chen flared up. haha. who cares anyway. the most dont go lab lor. haha.

same thing i did, i went to read lao da's blog. kop damn lotsa pics. gonna share now.

jin ling yue tuan. hehe. that most right guy, looked like yu rong of 183.

another pic of jin ling yue tuan. shuai neh. =)))))))))

heh heh. he very cute hor? haha. CHEN YI~~~!!!!

Nings

I LOVE YOU 6:06 PM

Sunday, April 16, 2006

sian. supposed to go bugis on friday one. but it rainied. so i guai guai stayed at home. slack and rot. went bugis on saturaday instead. expecting to see some people de. but i really no fate with them lor. shop around the whole bugis and the new opened shop houses for my badges. but sadly, all so expensive! sian one lor. bought a few things and went home liaos.

the rest of the days, i just rot and slack at home. sleep, sleep and sleep. i never study can. am too lazy. i think i will flanked my mid-year. sians. no one is there to motivate me.

next topic. hahaha. i simply love wanyu nowadays. although no more renfu le. but there is still this person called. CHEN YI! yeah. he has been like appearing for so many episodes liaos. so happy when got him. haha. today's dai zhong also got him. and not to forget, 2moro. haha. just now's charity show also got 2moro lor. so shuai can. then zsw sang dui zui. so mei chen yi lor.

boring. tml is monday again. is gonna be so boring again.

Nings`0.6

I LOVE YOU 11:33 PM

Friday, April 14, 2006

yesterday was sports day. what a great day. the weather was warm. we were screaming like hell. cheering for mdm gai and jun hao. and miss chuang helped us made special dedications to them. haha. she was damn funny and funky! LOLs. =)))) but sadly, after four years, the champion is still not GREEN house. but green house did better than the last three years. we got second. cheers! after the event, went makan with wan tat, wally, rafi, mel, xia, jiang zheng and tian tian. haha. ate then discuss some things. then went home. while me, wally and wan tat went to 7-11 to buy the disney collection badges. i was like crazy lah. i bought 15. costed me $3. much cheaper then buying stuffs worth $5 to get only one badge. haha. now am only left with eeyore, pooh, and tigger. sad. cant find them. anyone got them can give/sell me? i want them! thanks.

sighs. i fell sick after my afternoon nap. i was damn groggy and my nose was like running tap. gek gek studied my geog and went to slp. i nv do homework lor. sian. this morning wake up feeling much much better.

shan di luan zai dint turned up. Lian ai-ONG relief our class. he was using his phone to contact ppl for the election. then outside the construction site was making some funny noises. it sounded like elephants. LOLs. then xiin say is elephant doing that thing. sick right? haha.

F&N stars rocks lah. was reading ppl's blog then came across this word POH KIM. me, wally and ping laughed like crazy. then wally go ask mrs chen come see. i immediately close all the windows sia. so dui lian. HAHA. ended at 4pm. went home and sleep till 7++.

sighs. mom went genting. no dinner liaos. have to cook for myself. =( =)

Nings

I LOVE YOU 12:25 AM

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

` hahahahahaha. am so freaking happy now!!

LEON LIM YU ZHI! finally online. omg. I might be sua ku abit lah. but it has been a few months since I have last seen/ talk to him. haha. he was so different from the other PSS lor. He’s sooooo damn nice and friendly. Omg omg. We chatted from around 9pm to 9.45pm. {stupid sis, ask me go help bake cookies.} I ended the chat so reluctantly. Goddamn. Hope he online more often. Is nice talking to him. He replies so damn instantly. Like he’s damn free like that. Haha. we chatted abt superband, campus superstar. And I told him all the rubbish about the fun-ness and good-ness of forming a band. And he agrees with me yea. Haha. Great minds think alike. The “die together spirit.” Hahaha.

And omg. Wanyu’s guest were 2moro and Chen Yi neh. I was sooooo damn high lah. But I dint really watched lah. Was baking my cookies. Haha. but chen yi and 2moro damn funny lah. Haha.

It was a great day for me. It ended so “nicely”. With the chatting with leon, the appearance by 2moro and Chen Yi. a great day indeed.

sians.. tml got sports day.

Nings

I LOVE YOU 12:04 AM

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

years since i have blogged. so busy these few days. trying to solve some problems. sian.

phew~. thank god! LUCIFY got in. haha. soul wasnt as bad lah. dont care lah. just watch can liaos.

so many things have been coming up. am so tired of everything. hope everything will just stop. and wallace, dont be lame lah. the 7-11 auntie selling me for 20 cents each. opened liao de. can choose somemore. HAHA. tml am gonna buy.

may your hands and face rot in time to come. since you are so fond of avoiding me, avoid lor. i dont really care lor. promised me soooo many things. in the end leh. pi also nv show up. f you lah. and because of you, our relationship strained. f you again. you think am begging you? pui! go and die lah. {i have learnt not to say too much in blogs.}

woohoo~~~. my disney badget collection is getting crazy liaos. amanda helped me kop some. but i have decided to buy the rest. trying my best to collect all. wei le MICKEY. wo yuan yi!!! haha.

to mmp; long long time never see you online liao leh. die le huh? better come online k. got many things to say. esp the part with renene. haha.

Nings`0.6

I LOVE YOU 6:18 PM

Thursday, April 06, 2006

haha. just changed a poster. is 5566 leh. haha. i dont think is nice lah.. but dont care le. haha. gonna make another one for CHEN YI! haha. maybe after mid year bah. haha

sighs. am so bored by homework and coursework! everyday staying back for STARs. then after that will rush home to sleep. after sleep, will do homework and watch tv. sian sia. i need someone to brighten up my life. =)) today stayed back for fnn STARs. did some of my coursework and slack there lor. lucky is lab lah. if not i also wont go. me and foong ping laughed like crazy when one of the sec 5s played "feng" haha. think claudia went crazy bah. sitting in front of me.. and sliently starred at the comp. saw her smiling. haha =) went home. it rained again!! wth lor. continuously for so many days liaos. stupid weather. in the morning damn hot and afternoon rain. hais. no mood for anything. sian half! am crying in the rain again!

just now doing coursework in school then found some pics of yi lao da. haha. damn shuai de pics. love him sia. sharing with you guys!

side view of him doing his hair! =)))))) [look abit like Ben!]

he's in his office bah. haha. so cute lah. =)))))

and lastly. let me present the 11 snap shots of wang renfu!!!

so kawaii neh right. missing renfu liaos. he changed hairstyle liaos!!! am so gek now. stupid cheena.

yesterday benben online. lucky wally told me. if not i will be watching wanyu. haha. we talked alot lah. but he reply damn slow lah. he say his msn got 600 ppl. ya. i can understand lah. haha. he damn crappy de. i ask him that then he gave me a super "cold" answer. funny hor? ben rocks my world!

and tml sch function until 9.30am. guess what? am the student audience. have to go back at 3.15pm. f lah. but nvm. just enjoy myself tml. first time am the audience sia. everytime am the one performing. what speacial year to me. ^^v

and i had a fun time chatting with renene. she's another crapper. always so agitated when mentioning some things. hahaha. yeah! PSS rocks with someone around!

Nings`56

I LOVE YOU 7:48 PM

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

` after bathing. i came up with new thoughts again. i think i should blog it out. because i cant possibly keep everything in my heart right? so... here it goes. but to some people who think am sprouting nonsense again, PLEASE DO NOT SCROLL DOWN. IT WILL HURT YOUR ANGELIC EYES! the more i read someone's blog the angrier i am. ..

seriously, everything is not amanda's fault lah. so you no need to ttm so much. but however sometimes its because of you. i only say sometimes. but most of the times is because of other things. and amanda, trust is not the problem now. it is understanding. dont keep saying that i bloody nv care abt your feelings. but did you in the first place? sometimes yes? sometimes no? i want you to kindly recall the past and say how many times have i left you all without saying a word? i bet more than 3 times? so. whats the problem with me now? i keep on giving reasons trying to divert away the real reason. why am i doing so? because i dont want to break up the friendship. and check my blog archives, how many times have i mention the word "depression and depressed"? i bet is X times. so, what has happened to me again?

remember this phrase "i always put up a smile to hide the pain.." yup. i have been hiding everything inside my heart so as not to destroy this relationship. however, i have not success. recall; when we go out, am always the one walking in front, or being left at the back. how would you feel? after sch; am always the one waiting for you all.. have you all been waiting for me? i dare not say never. but most of the time, am the one waiting. afterall, you might say we are from the different class. so, our relationship might change abit. and our timetable might be different. what you all say in class i dont know. so am always out of the topic.

i believe my friendship with amanda wont change/ broken up so easily.. anyway, am stressing again.. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. and i still dont understand whats the two side thingy. and so you agree that somebody's blog is referring to me? oh how glad. some overage ppl right? wow. what a "nice" word to use on my family members.

i love to blog, i love to bitch around, i love to badmouth people, i have so many things to hide/avoid/ashamed off. these habits of mine makes me soooooo much different from you. you say i nv do anything. so why must i purposely send the sms wrongly to yiwen? i was the one who have taken the first step. you leh? stand there and wait for the stars to drop? did you bother to do anything?

rafi is right... am always the one taking the first step. doing all the things. and lastly, the one who always kenna all the faults. my ordeal of life.

i might be bull-shitting right now. i dont care! feel free to leave. in the first place, i nv invite you to come here.

your attitude towards wan tat is a classic example. you cant stop ppl from mixing around. you cant stop him from talking to his friends. you dont own the whole world. well... overage ppl!

Nings`0.6

I LOVE YOU 9:14 PM

woooohooooo!!! zhi yang won!! haha. i was quite sad when dean dint make it. but overall, they did very well!! yesterday's last esp of CSS, i cried like crazy lah. was damn emotional. coz like what yin wei say "monday will be different without you guys." ya. monday-different. i will always the remember the class of 2006.

geraldine; adriano; khim; yiyuan; mei gui; chi yang

just found out one super jin bao news!!! teresa [yes, am talking abt the CSS one.]'s brother is in BROADRICK. [ya! stop starring and stop rubbing your eyes.] i was so shocked k. haha.

have been super busy with my tests and my homework. and today we got a structured essay question from mrs chen. all of us thought it was a normal short answer questions test. but it wasnt. sighs. i just ccp what i've study lor. also dont know correct anot. then i started reading ppl's blogs. found out many many things lah.

-firstly, recall the hsi hong incident. i wasnt siding anybody lah. i was only accompanying her . she was all alone then. wasnt she? now back to my case. i am now all alone. who is here to accompany me? nobody? so... hopefully, that answers your wonders abt why am with her when i nv hear the story from your side. also, remember what hsi hong told you [referring to amanda] that there's this someone blah blah blah. remember? she was talking about me lah.

- the pie thing; i have long forgotten it liaos. due to some other reasons. i chose to AP you all.

there are still a few incidents which i wanted to blog abt. but however, after reading somebody's blog.. i have decided not to. because what i say is always bullshit and none of you all want to listen to my nonsensicial stuffs right? so...

HAHAHA! am so lucky! last night CHEN YI made his appearance in wanyu! haha. then today i heard his new song in Fm933. "an lian wo!" haha. what a zi lian kuang image...haha everyone must have CHEN YI!

also read kenneth's blog. he is a real backstabber. i always see him like nv sing properly and always see other contestants dance steps.. then now he blamed the other contestants. pls lah. ppl top 10 of course can action action abit can. he leh? pui! say ppl very action. you also mah. you so outcast! pls lah. you nv do your best in all the performances still say other ppl. no wonder you kenna beaten up the other time.

I LOVE YOU LAY CHIN!! you rock my world. !!!

Nings`56!

I LOVE YOU 6:18 PM

Saturday, April 01, 2006

` it has been days since i update. have been busy with my school work as there are soooo many tests coming up for me. have been doing my blog skin as well.. will be up by next week bah.. stay tuned!!

today april fool. went out with jacqueline to kbox. omg! am so high lah. and guess what???!!!! GOT CHEN YI's songs leh!! i went gaga lah. but i only managed to sing zi lian kuang! haha.. and i realised that jacqueline love tension so much. she sing all those songs i nv hear before de. and its like so damn old. haha. and ah mei too!! next time we go again k. sing finish the songs that we dint manage to today. hahahahaha.. after that went parkway shop shop to look out for the things jacqueline need for her birthday party! parkway was flooded with ppl. so damn crowded lor. after that went home liaos. reached home baked cookies and sponge cake. just bought a electric mixer mah.. need to try out. haha. turned out to be very tasty!! haha.. [drooling..~]

i finally know why.. because one of them is missing.. thats why.......... its ok de. am always the dai ti pin. lucky am not so stupid to................................

haha. my mom and sis damn bad lah. bad mouth somebody... haha. what they say is like what exactly wally have said lah. all the same stuffs. haha. everybody is on my side now. haha. my sis damn bad lah. say until ppl like so cham. haha...

some ppl are just so mei CHEN YI!.. nvm forget it. dont have me also no difference mah. since you all enjoyed yourself so much.

to the one who talk to wally on friday; you are not me. so you dont feel the being "left out" feeling.

to other person; i know you have been avoiding me. recall clearly what you say to me when you got abandoned by some ppl. you nv do as what you have said. yup.

missing renfu!!

Nings`56

I LOVE YOU 10:58 PM